Women Are Tired Of Your Shit, Men

On Twitter, the PostSecret guy linked to the video in the article The woman who made a video about catcalling is already getting rape threats. The video is kind of unsettling for me to watch, and I’m not a pretty woman.

Of course, the woman who made this is getting rape threats now. Men don’t like being called out on their bad behavior. Look at the NFL, or the ruckus known as Gamergate for more examples, although c’mon, you know this is far from a new thing.

One guy commenting on Twitter said, basically, “What’s wrong with what most of these guys are saying?” Against my better judgment, I decided to write back. “Let’s try this: Would you say anything to a guy?” (I’m assuming this man is straight and the attractiveness of the guy is no issue.) He said yes — he’d be just trying to be friendly. OK, take him at his word. In many parts of the world, this might be a common thing, though let’s note the catcall video was taken in New York City, a place not known for small-town friendliness. Anyway, I guess he doesn’t see the nonverbals in what the guys in the video are doing when they “just say hi” to the filmmaker as she walks purposefully down the street. He pretty much says as much. I had to drop out of the exchange at this point, but some other commenters tried to explain what he wasn’t seeing.

I’m just amazed that men act this way toward women, verbally or digitally, in the year 2014. I see it with my own eyes; it’s not as if I can disbelieve it. You can’t say, as us progressive types sometimes do about things like racism and anti-gay beliefs, that “oh it’s just old men, they’ll be gone soon.” It’s men of most ages. Not all men, of course. But many men. Because of that, a woman can’t trust any man she doesn’t know. It turns streets into gauntlets to be run. At best. And it’s turning social media into a hellish pit for women who dare to speak out.

Not trying to get a cookie here (http://www.sinfest.net/view.php?date=2013-03-23), just … well, we gotta do better. Maybe we should stop trying to get ourselves out of responsibility by saying “it’s not all men.” So you don’t do this, great. What do you do?


About songdogmi

I'm a longhaired almost-hippie stuck in the inner suburbs of a major rust-belt metropolis who's thoughtful, creative, and kind of geeky. In exchange for a paycheck I run around in a cubicle maze most days. When I escape, I play music, hang out in coffee houses, dink around on the computer, take naps, and think I should be off in the woods somewhere. Every once in a while I get in my car and drive far, far away, though I've always come back so far.
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2 Responses to Women Are Tired Of Your Shit, Men

  1. changeling72 says:

    I have to say, I do get rather tired of being judged by my gender and/or sexuality.The rape threats are appalling and expose such people for what they really are. Most probably socially inadequate virgins who haven’t seen a vagina since the day they were born.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Welcome to the world of the 51%, gentlemen. :/

    One of my more unpleasant memories of NMU involved a walk from class back to my dorm one night on the circle drive and having a carload of drunks follow me almost all the way yelling, “Yo, Adrienne! Marry me!” When I didn’t respond, the b-word and c-word were brought into play. After that, I made sure that I had someone to walk with, or stayed in very brightly lit places.

    Personally, I’d love to see the ones guilty of this behavior forced to run a gauntlet and see how they feel afterwards.

    Charlie, on behalf of the 51%, thank you for writing this.


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