First, it’s worth noting that during the latter part of last week, I felt as if I was on the verge of coming down with a cold or something. This will explain things, somewhat.
Saturday, I was busily pulling weeds in my front yard, destroying botany on a small scale, when my neighbor offered to bring his chain saw over to cut down some trees that were growing along my back yard fence, where they shouldn’t have. Last year these trees were knocking my privacy fence over through their exuberance. So we destroyed botany on a larger scale and chopped them down. And later I mowed grass.*
Then on Sunday, the Mother’s Day celebration took place at my house. We made pizzas from scratch, which is a lot of fun. There were four cigarette smokers in my house. It was raining, so they couldn’t go outside.
So it should be no surprise that at around 7:00 p.m., my sinuses completely gave up and started outputting as if they were the Niagara River heading into Lake Ontario. Five hours later, they achieved something I thought would not be possible: A sinus headache while the sinuses were still draining.
I think sinuses are proof that Intelligent Design is a hoax. Yes, it can be argued there was some contributory negligence in my case, between the tree dust and the smoke and all. But still.
So if anyone’s looking for me at an open mic night tomorrow, um, sorry. *achoo!snort!*
*Sometimes I wonder why I don’t move into an asphalt parking lot.